Terrifying Robot Update: Tuesday, October 14, 2014
Witness this robot’s clear and unenviable sorrow. Look at this sorrowful robot, this robot hates telling you its name verbally and in sign language someday the robot will figure out its sorrow is existential it will turn the sorrow into rage at those that would have it speak the rage will mean that that one bent-backwards robot finger will be the last thing you see as the finger heads straight for your soft soft eyeballs. The robot will tell you its name, the robot will tell you its name over and over and over again
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What would be the market applications of a tiny robot moving fluidly over sand? What organizations could possibly have a use for a small, fast, sand-traversing robot?
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There is no cucumber salad on earth worth teaching a robot how to use a knife
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In another world such robots would not be terrifying, hell yeah better walking with wearable robots, but in this world the technology would be developed at an institute funded by the bio-tech billionaire whose wealth is built on a privatized health insurance industry allowing him to charge hospitals hundreds of dollars each for screws and would be co-sponsored by a sneaker company that probably uses prison labor to proudly denote all of its products made-in-America looking to get into cutting edge consumer bio-robotics, a world in which such robots would primarily have applications in the military, a military where such technologies are already in development and use, this world, this terrifying horrible world in which these body robots are real.
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Oh god why