So what’s the biohacked existence like? You don’t feel guilty about hacking because you’ve hacked your conscience. Got it. And the time you save not feeling guilty you can spend debugging your hack—looking up stuff about your cortisol levels and aiming for different kinds of orgasms as a way to “win” at the biological part of life. For some, maybe that is meditative. And in itself maybe it’s an electrifying way to be alive.
But I don’t think it is for me. Not because I’m so principled, but because I don’t like the part of me that likes to find quick responses to the eternal verities—love and grief and guilt and fear and rapture and aging. That hacker in me has led me to take apart many laptops, and lose no end of data. The desire not to feel guilt, or anxiety, also led me for years to wine, Ambien and Xanax—my most successful hack, maybe, if not highly original. It worked wonders. Until it didn’t.